Days 43 & 44 (56 to go)

Blimey can't believe I'm on day 44 already! Just logged on to post & couldn't remember what day I was on, so had to look it up and it was a bit of a shock to tell you the truth! It's kind of crept up on me I guess, as I've had a couple of really weird weeks where I've only been able to post occasionally which has thrown me out a bit!

Well, that's cheered me up and given me a little boost actually, so yay!

Yesterday was pretty good, the usual manic time at work, so much so that I didn't drink enough of my water through the day & had to down a load when I got back. It was the first of my 'new' sessions last night, I ended up leaving the house a bit late as I got caught on a call, but just made it in time (thanks mostly to the lack of traffic, I love school holidays ;-)

Was a bit nervous actually, I've been thinking a lot about whether to keep on with LL or go down the Cambridge route. I think I've become really skeptical about the whole thing, the counsellor leaving was a real let-down, I've been concerned that the old LLC didn't give us all the things she should have (for example the green foundation book) and just generally felt disappointed in the management of LL.

Anyway, I walked in to a warm welcome from the new counsellor & took a seat, there were a few others there (none I knew) but then two of the ladies from my original group arrived. It was great to see them, they were both pleased to see me too & told me they'd been worried when I hadn't turned up last week, which was really lovely! A few more people turned up, in total there were ten of us which was quite a nice size actually.

There were four of us who hadn't made the previous week, so we all had to fill in forms again to transfer over to the new counsellor, then we all sat around chatting (mostly about the old LLC!) whilst we were all weighed & measured. There was a lot of strong feeling about how let down we'd been actually, I know I shouldn't have been surprised but most people were angry with how the ex LLC had handled it (via a text to us all with no notice!). It was good to talk about it though and hopefully this will mean we can all now move on from it.

The weigh-in was very interesting and it became abundantly clear just how little the old LLC had done with us. She made me wee on a stick which came out darkish pink, then weighed me & even with my shoes on I'd lost 7 1/2 lb in 2 weeks :-) She also measured my chest, waist & hips but I've nothing to compare as this hadn't been done before at a weigh-in! She was also going to take my photo (again didn't have one taken at the start) but she said there wasn't much point any more as I've not got too much further to go, bless her!

The weigh-ins took an age as she had to go through so much with each of us, but after that we had a bit of an ice-breaker session (we all had to say who we were & one thing we liked & disliked (though no mentioning food!)) & as we went round the room we had to say all the previous ones too, which caused a few laughs. Was good actually and was starting to feel much more comfortable with the group, so it must have done the job!

It must be strange for everyone being put into a different group like that - I think the 3 of us from our old group are the newest into the program on week 7 - there are people from weeks 9 & 10 and some from development who have been on it for ages. We finished off with a brief chat about how the sessions are going to work moving forwards, as she obviously can't use the weeks in the foundation program. The new LLC does seem much more clued up and with it though which is a good sign, I get the feeling that we'll definitely make progress with her.

She also wrote down all the various bits we were missing, it seems each group is missing something different! She's going to speak to LL head-office about getting them to us, which will be great. I particularly want to read the foundation book as they look like they could be quite good for information & motivation, so I hope she can get them for us.

I also got food packs for the coming week & filled in the food packs to pick up next week as A (the new LLC) does them a week in advance. It was sooo nice having full choice again! I got more lemon & toffee bars, plus mushroom & chicken soups, fantastic! It's really strange isn't it? Being on the diet & having a really limited choice of flavours, then having that choice reduced to just 2 or 3 for over a week and suddenly I find myself craving LL flavours! I'm still thinking it's a real treat to have mushroom soup & a lemon bar today (hope this lasts for a while at least before the novelty wears off again!!).

So, much against my expectations I did actually really enjoy the session & left feeling really positive about LL again, which is such a relief. It does however leave me with a bit of a dilemma about the riding - I had a good think about it on the drive back home, and what I think I'll do is cancel next week's riding too as that will be the first proper counselling session with her. After that, I'll try to work it on a fortnightly basis, so one week I'll go to the complete session, the following week I'll go to the weigh in & stay for the first 1/2 hour before going to the riding. I'll try that for a few weeks to see how that goes.

Wish there was a better solution but actually I only have another 7 weeks on my official foundation & I'll have to see what weight I'm at by then. I know I'm not going to be on my packs for the wedding or for all of the honeymoon (I was hoping to be on maintenance by then so I can at least have some meals & not packs all the time!) but I'm really thinking now that as soon as I get back from it I'll go straight back on to lose the extra stone I need to, rather than go straight onto maintenance after foundation just because of the wedding.

Anyway, that'll all depend on what weight I'm at by the start of June, which is an age away. Right, I'm off to dig the bike out of the attic (don't ask - it's been there whilst h2b's been rebuilding a car in the garage so there was no space for it!!). Think I'm going to have to increase my exercise a few notches if I'm going to have any hope of getting to my ideal weight rather than my wedding target weight before the wedding, but I'm gonna try!!

Sorry for the length of the post, by the way, just found myself with a lot to say today for some reason ;-)
Promise tomorrow's will be much shorter!