Tuesday 22nd May - post Hen night!! (Day 84!)

Busy week again so not had much time. Have been running around ordering bits & pieces for the wedding & trying to sort out table plans, favours, gifts etc around a hectic week at work! We went to see Meatloaf on Weds night at the NEC - we've seen him before & have to say it really wasn't one of his better performances, which was a bit of a shame. Still, was still good to see, he is such a showman (even if his vocals were a bit under par this time!).

One good thing that came out of it though was we saw a flier for upcoming events so have bought tickets to see Bill Bailey in November! We've both wanted to see him for quite some time so am really looking forward to it - we've been saying for ages we really ought to go & see more shows, theatre & comedy as we're so close to Birmingham at the moment - with plans for h2b to get a new job, who knows where we'll end up, so lets make the most of it whilst we still can!!

I had my hen night at the weekend - what a fantastic time! We had a bridesmaid dress fitting Saturday morning, which was fantastic, the girls all looked fab! There's a few alterations to be done but all should be finished by next weekend. Was also a relief to see the dresses in the colour we picked (it's a dark purple, but not bright like the cadbury's purple everyone thinks of when you say purple!) - here's a pic of Laura wearing hers (though the colour isn't very clear!)

The rest of the day was fantastic too - had lunch with everyone, then went karting in the afternoon. We had to rope a few of the boys in to make sure we had enough to do the endurance race (where you race in teams rather than individually) - was loads of fun. We picked partners randomly and somehow the two most competitive guys ended up on the same team (no surprise who won then!!). There was also a bit of a surprise as they have a special pink go-kart for the hen, which they made me drive!!

I ended up with my mother on my team & was very funny - we didn't get a medal but we did get the wooden spoon award for most crashes!!

After that we all piled round to my friends house to get ready, before heading over to another friend's house who was hosting the dinner - got a 'taxi' there which turned out to be a limo! Here's a pic of me ready to leave & in the limo, then all of us outside the limo once we'd arrived!

It was a fab evening - they had slaved away all Friday & most of Saturday to create a fantastic meal that lasted most of the night. They'd also really thought about my diet (I'd said before LL that the hen night would be an exception as I didn't want them to worry about it!) - anyway, they'd planned an Italian feast, so lots of cold meats, salads, olives etc for starters, a very small pasta dish, then chicken & veal for the main course & not very many carbs in anything! I really enjoyed it actually & although I did eat, didn't go silly & stopped when I felt full too - I was quite impressed with myself!!

I also had a few drinks but it really was only a couple of glasses - I had a fantastic evening, and didn't consciously make a decision to restrict my drinking, I just did it automatically! Oh how I've changed!! I did have a small bit of the desserts but hey, and I enjoyed it but it was enough!

The next morning we looked at everyone's photos & have to say I was really pleasantly surprised! I've hated having my photo taken for so long, & try to avoid being in front of the camera as much as possible. I don't' think I've seen a photo of me since I started the diet, so was really shocked at the change when I saw the photos! I'm just amazed, and it really is proof that the diet is working!

I was really pleased with the outfit too - had popped to Next in the week as I really didn't have anything to wear - it was fab shopping! The skirt I love - the whole outfit is a size 14 (which was a shock in itself!) and the best bit is the skirt is already loose! Grin!

Back on track with CD now, was worried I would struggle & there was an 'oh do I really have to' moment yesterday morning, but gritted my teeth and got through it, so am back on track again. According to my scales I've put on .2 of an lb so am really happy about that too, and now have the focus for the next 4 weeks! My CDC is moving me up to 790 this Wednesday too - that will be weird re-introducing a little bit of protein & greens every day!

Anyway, enough waffle for one day, hope everyone had a great weekend - gonna try to catch up with the blogs in a bit...

Catch up! Day 77 (Tuesday 12th May)

Well, I know I've been really crap at keeping the blog up to date over the past few weeks, didn't realise it's almost 3 weeks since I last posted though!! I've had a busy few weeks as you've probably already guessed, both at work (where I'm snowed under at the mo!) and wedding stuff, plus being away at the weekends - none of which has helped as I've not had much time to get on to the computer! I have been managing to read most people's blogs (sorry for the lack of comments but I've been snatching a few mins here & there!) but just haven't had a chance to post here - and the longer I left it, the more stuff I had to write, & the more I put it off until I had time!!

Anyway, the main news is about the diet - back on the 25th I decided to try seeing if the whole going one week to the full session & one week to riding would work. This was the first full session I went along to - the LLC was good and the people in the group seemed nice, but we had another 3 people join who were all coming back to LL after a break & after having put weight back on. It seems it's an open session for 're-starters' which is what she's had to group us in with, not ideal!

The weighing, measuring & sorting out of foodpacks took well over an hour again, meaning we had about 20 mins left for counselling, and she went back over some stuff from week 4 which we'd already covered. She was much better than the previous LLC & it was informative, but I couldn't help wishing she'd picked a week we hadn't covered yet!

I also found out that LL don't have a record of any of us from our original group, which means we had to to fill in all the forms again and also would need to get another medical check - more hassle. To top it all off, it turned out that the new LLC was going on holiday for 2 weeks. That wasn't an issue in itself, however it did mean that with the locum things would be a bit unsettled, and the week she gets back, I'm then not able to go for two weeks. That will effectively leave me just 1 week (the original week 14) before I'd want to go to management anyhow.

So all in all, not a good day. I left feeling really down about the whole thing, and couldn't help thinking that without the counselling, was I really getting my money's worth from sticking with LL? I couldn't help but feel disappointed with the whole thing , just when I thought things were back on track...

Anyway, I had enough food packs to last another 2 weeks, so decided to continue at home & think things over. I also talked things over with h2b who was really supportive. I looked at other options, such as moving to CD or moving to Atkins, and in the end decided to move over to CD as I think the abstinence / food packs have worked really well (and to be honest the thought of having to cook for myself at this stage is a little scary!!).

So, last Wednesday I went & saw my local CDC - she was lovely & very supportive. She was happy to move me over there & then onto CD (& she was complimentary of the LL counselling & process), so after filling in all the forms & being weighed & measured (yay I'm into the 12 stone now (just!!)) she sorted out my packs. She's given me some of everything (except for the Butterscotch which is apparently just like the caramel, & the Thai chili equivalent, neither of which I'm overly fond of).

I was really surprised by the amount of choice - for the sweet flavours there are: Vanilla, Cappuccino, Chocolate, Choc Mint, Toffee & Walnut, Strawberry, Banana, Fruits of the Forest & Butterscotch. For the savoury there are: Chicken & Mushroom, Mushroom, Vegetable, Oriental Chili, Broccoli & Cheese and Spicy Tomato. For the bars there are: Orange, Chocolate, Malt Toffee, Caramel, plus 2 chewy ones: Peanut and Cranberry. The bars are all covered in milk chocolate (except the orange which is dark choc).

I took 2 weeks supply as I can't go to see her this week (out at a Meatloaf concert!). I have to say, the packs & bars are a damn sight better tasting than the LL ones! I'm not sure if it' was just the joy of having so much choice after 10 weeks on LL, but I'm really enjoying it!

I also explained about the wedding looming up on me (arg, it's only 5 1/2 weeks away now!!) & she was great about it, she says I'll do the first 2 weeks on Sole Source (i.e. just the packs) then she'll start moving me up the stages so that I'll be able to eat most food groups by the wedding :-) She actually said before I even mentioned the wedding that I wouldn't have to be on SS for too many weeks, which made me feel good too - there is light at the end of the tunnel! She also said I can start to introduce some protein for a few nights before next Wednesday's session, in preparation for moving up a step.

So that's pretty much all in terms of where the diet now is - I stayed on packs the whole time through the change to CD, though I confess I did have a bit of a slip over the weekend, bizarrely not on food so much, but on wine. I know I shouldn't have, but we were still trying to sort out the wines for the wedding and were getting increasingly fed up with the whole thing (plus we're really needing to order them!). So on Saturday we went out & got a couple of bottles to test, and I had a few glasses of wine, plus a small bit of chicken & some spinach.

Felt really guilty about it next day, but it was wet, rainy & miserable so I had another glass that evening (though just one this time). I was also feeling down as I don't seem to have lost much this week (even before Sat night!). I have had trouble drinking all my water though & have been really bad at it since Thursday, so maybe that's why? Anyway, have dusted myself off now, am not going to feel guilty about it any more & am going to make a good push for the last few weeks on the run up to the wedding.

I've also been a bit crap on the whole exercise thing - after making the effort to get my bike out of the loft & fixed, it's been raining so I've not made the effort to go out on it, then I had a sore throat & cough / cold last week so used that as an excuse! Anyway, woke up this morning feeling much better, much less tired & much more positive about everything. Did my 1/2 hour on the treadmill and the LL exercises, and even managed to nip out for 20 mins on the bike at lunchtime!

Ok, sorry about the length of the post - was going to include some of the other bits that have been happening over the past few weeks, but think I'll leave that till tomorrow now!! Right, off to make some jewellery for the bridesmaids, can't believe it's 8pm already!

Night x